Monday, January 12, 2009

How would you take it?

I was on the treadmill-and actually running as opposed to my normal walking. The treadmill just happens to be in the spare bedroom along with the computer. As I was on the treadmill, Cowboy was working on the computer, when I started running he said,

"You are starting to shake the computer, I may need to shore up the floor."

How would you take that comment?


Caroline said...

You don't want to know what I would do.

I am sorry he said that to you. I think it was totally inappropriate.

sunnye said...

I would say, "I don't even know what shore up the floor MEANS!"

Lynilu said...

I don't know what I would say or do, but I'd be angry and hurt. I suppose he was joking, but that isn't funny, whether you weigh 400 or 99. Bottom line .... I wouldn't take it well at all.

I know you don't know me, but you need to consider what I say here. Red flags are waving, IMO.

I spent 31 years with a man who spoke without thinking .... A LOT. He "was kidding," or was "just reminding" me of something. I shouldn't have stayed that long, because his thoughtless remarks left me in a state that has taken 3 years to rebuild my self-esteem and confidence enough to begin trusting again. The work is not done yet, but I won't ever do that again, let myself be where I'm always wondering. The endless "Is it me?" "Does he means that?" "What does he mean?" will undermine your relationship.

You need to talk about this NOW, and have it settled before March. "Kidding" isn't OK, nor are "helpful" but hurtful remarks if anyone is hurt or weakened in the process. If either person doesn't find it humorous, it isn't. Period.

Sorry, MJ, if what I'm saying upsets you, but think it over carefully. You wouldn't have asked this question if it were OK with you. Better to slow everything down and think it through than to marry a situation that is painful and permanent.

Anonymous said...

Tell him that you have a big sister that is going to kick his butt!
You know my situation, so maybe I don't have a lot of room to talk, or maybe I do. I don't want you to end up in a situation like mine.
Kidding or not, it was a hurtful thing to say. Talk to him and let him know how you feel about those kind of comments. You have never had a problem with telling someone how you feel, don't start now.
love you, Kim

Monogram Queen said...

Well it depends on what time of the month it is LOL I might just laugh and shrug it off or I might get roaringly pissed off!!!